It’s not that I’m vain, really. It’s just that here I am, reflecting on my four years (!) of tweets. More than 12,000 dumb things thrown at somewhat suspecting strangers and a friend or thirty. And in those 12,000, maybe a dozen not-so-bad thoughts.
Here they are, for what they’re worth, as selected by the twitter community (by the way of favorites and retweets and such). My best tweets:
★ Personality is 40% genetics, 40% upbringing, and 20% the last book you read.
★ When you’re peeing, coughing is like holding the B button in Super Mario.
★ In a moment of clarity, I realize that emptying the lint trap is in essence throwing out my clothes very slowly.
★ Don’t bother, the Steve Jobs sex tape isn’t that hot. It’s mostly him calling the buttons and UI on the Sony camcorder “absolute garbage.”
★ Snack time on the plane. The two guys next to me get the peanuts. “I’ll join the peanut gallery,” I say. No one laughs. 4 hours to go.
★ Next time I need to search for something, I think I’ll try Google.
★ You know those restaurant signs where the pig is roasting itself? Wireless providers’ ads should show a contract fucking itself in the ass.
★ When will Lego stop taking away our freedoms and finally allow compatibility with Playmobil pieces? Where is the outrage?
★ Thirty years from now, the “2000’s” effect will make your photos look like they were taken with an iSight camera in a poorly lit bedroom.
★ If your house listing doesn’t include any pictures, I’m just going to assume your house is a fat guy.
★ With the ball dropped, the champagne popped, the fireworks fired, it is now time to declare it: 2010 is the year of Linux on the desktop.
Thanks for reading!